


I don't know what to do

by Storyflight



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types
Genre: ADD character, Alternate Universe - Hope's Peak Academy (Dangan Ronpa), Alternate Universe - Non-Despair (Dangan Ronpa), Angst, Autistic Character, Awkward Conversations, Background Akamatsu Kaede/Iruma Miu - Freeform, Background Nanami Chiaki/Tsumiki Mikan, Background Relationships, Crushes, Denial of Feelings, Developing Friendships, Developing Relationship, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, F/F, Falling In Love, First Kiss, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Iruma Miu's Dirty Mouth, Late Night Conversations, Longing, Love Confessions, Mutual Pining, Nonbinary Amami Rantaro, Nonbinary Nanami Chiaki, Nonbinary Shinguji Korekiyo, Other, Platonic Relationships, Self-Doubt, Self-Reflection, Yearning
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-23
Updated: 2020-04-23
Packaged: 2021-02-28 21:54:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,424
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23354257
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Storyflight/pseuds/Storyflight
Summary: It's hard when you fall for someone who never thinks for themselvesAnd it's just as bad when falling for someone is considered selfish
Relationships: Amami Rantaro & Sonia Nevermind, Amami Rantaro & Sonia Nevermind & Togami Byakuya, Amami Rantaro/Tojo Kirumi, Ishimaru Kiyotaka & Tojo Kirumi, Pekoyama Peko & Tojo Kirumi, Sonia Nevermind/Pekoyama Peko
Kudos: 14





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Mistakes were made, I wrote this sometime ago and I want to hurt them, whoops

It was only the sound of the white noise machine until there’s a knock on the door. Sonia exhales hotly, must be another prank from Hiyoko or Teruteru asking for... _ something.  _ It's midnight, most of her class would be resting by now, if not they’re in their labs or dining hall. 

Sonia sits up from her seat. Maybe it’s Korekiyo, they could have new information about demonic history and sharing it with her, please let it be them. She was enjoying her book and wished to not be disturbed.

She opens the door, then does a double-take. It was not anyone from her class nor Korekiyo. She’s greeted with a calm yet bright smile and nervous emerald eyes. They never stopped by her dorm before, better yet, she’s sure Rantaro Amami never set foot in the Jabberwock Dormitory. “Uh…” They fiddle with their thumbs and stare down at the ground, “I need to talk to you”

“Well, hello to you too” She jokes, “But make yourself at home”

Rantaro nods and enters the dorm, one bigger than other rooms. The school ended up giving her a dorm twice the size as normal because of her background, but she wished to have a normal-sized one and feel like a  _ normal  _ student here. It’s good for visitors but…

Rantaro sits in a peculiar way in the available chair. They’re laying on it sideways with legs dangling on the armrest. The backrest is nonexistent to them. “Hey, I’m uh…sorry I came to you at this time of night. I can’t talk to anyone in my class and then if I woke Togami-kun...well” they chuckle lightheartedly, “He would kill me”

“What’s wrong?” Sonia sits across from them on her beige bed, “It was my duty in my kingdom to send aid to my citizens, I shall do the same with my humble classmates”

“Okay well, have you...this is embarrassing...uh…” They twirl the ends of their hair, “How do you get rid of a crush?”

“A—“ she’s needed for romantic advice? By the person she least expected? And Rantaro has a crush? That’s possible? _On who?_ Rantaro acts like an older sibling around everyone here! “A crush? As in, romantic feelings?”

“Yes, that” they fold their hands and rest them on their lap, “I want to get rid of this feeling. I know it’s stupid but do you know anything? I tried ignoring it but...I see them every day, I can’t avoid it no matter how hard I try”

So this crush is in their class. “Amami-san, I don’t get it” she crosses her arms, “Why do you want to get rid of it? Is your crush with someone already?”

“I  _ wish,  _ then maybe I won’t think that I have a chance” The Adventurer never looked so gloomy. They’re one that keeps a small smile on their face at all times, Sonia felt pity. “I know that I cannot be with them, there’s no way”

“Same” she mutters. Sonia hopes that it was quiet enough for Rantaro to not hear, but the slight head rise said it all.  _ Damnit,  _ Sonia tenses up and turns her attention to a painting hanging on the wall. 

“You’re going through something similar?” Rantaro’s pitch rises with interest, “I didn’t know, now I feel bad for asking you…”

She’s told two other students in Rantaro’s class about this, might as well make it a third. Sonia scratches the back of her neck and has her mind wander somewhere else. The strong, intelligent girl with luxurious silver hair, crimson red eyes with such a sharp gaze, and swift reflections. One wrong move and you’re done for. 

“It’s fine, this isn’t about me! It’s about-” she points at the younger student, “You! You don’t have to tell me who they are, but why do you think you can’t be with them?”

Who wouldn’t want to be with Rantaro? They’re a caring and thoughtful individual, anyone close to them is considered lucky. Why the doubt? Is it them being humble?

Rantaro swings one leg. “Because it’s impossible. They have a life to focus on. Their talent, their future, all of that, there’s no room for me”

“I’m sure there is—“

“No” they cut her off, “They put themselves above others, never think about what  _ they  _ want, and it’s…” they shake their head, “They’re human! They have personal desires, I’ve seen it! But I know my romantic feelings would interfere with their path. Nevermind-san, I…”

Sonia stays silent and allows them to regain their thoughts. Although, this painful silence gives her a reality check.  _ Same, same! SAME!  _ Peko only sees herself as a tool, so every relationship is considered a master with their servant.  _ It’s hard to believe if we are friends or not, maybe she only does this because she’s told to… _

Rantaro clears their throat and Sonia has their undivided attention.

“I really like Toujou-san” they admit. Yup, called it. That has to be one of the only students they never treat as a sibling. Rantaro spends a lot of time with her and always together as a pair. One is constantly talking about whatever goes on and the other listens intently.  _ They would make a good couple, I’m sure of it. But Kirumi is too stubborn with her work and Rantaro is not going to cause any havoc.  _

“I like her a lot, a shit-ton, a whole bunch, so much, I...guess you could say I’m in love with her” Rantaro bites their tongue, “Maybe I’m too young to say that but...I want to stop feeling like this. I want to remain friends with her and nothing else because her title as a maid is important” they lean back on the armrest, “So...that’s it, and I want to have all of my feelings for her turn into a glass ball so I can smash it into pieces”

“Holy fuck” was all Sonia could say.  _ Wow, it feels like I’m talking to myself. What would I tell myself? Not to do anything? No...cannot say that to Rantaro.  _ “Oh, I’m sorry. That’s a poor choice of words”

“Nah” Rantaro rubs their cheek, “I understand, It feels good to tell someone. There’s no way I could tell anyone in my class. I’m sure everyone knows how I feel about her...Momota-kun asked if I had feelings for her and booooy, was that eventful. Stuttered like I was five again! Anyway, I…” They frown, “Nevermind-san, I don’t know what to do...If I avoid her, she will notice and I would upset her. If I tell her how I feel, she’s going to reject me and it’ll be awkward! If I don’t do anything, my feelings would only grow!”

“Amami-san…”

“Nevermind-san, I’ve thought about  _ marrying  _ her!” They sit up in their strange position, “I’m seventeen! I should be worrying about graduating! Not marriage!”

“Amami-san, Listen” Sonia raises a leg and pulls their chair closer to her. There’s a better look at their green eyes; fear, discomfort, panic, regret, and yet she can see a twinkle of yearning and adoration. It’s everything that she feels when seeing Peko,  _ but this isn’t about me.  _ “This isn’t some small crush, I could tell that she means a lot to you. I think you should let her know”

Rantaro almost falls off the chair. “W-What?! Are you crazy?!”

Sonia nods. “I get that a lot! But this is something special, it’s not like you’re both total strangers. Hoarding any sort of feelings isn’t good, it’ll eat you up! It’s like...you’re food and your feelings are Owari”

“I…” They blink a couple of times, “That’s a...comparison, alright”

“But it makes sense! Go for it, Amami-san! Uh...when you’re ready. Please...don’t let this one get away, cause I know you’re going places”

Rantaro swallows on air. “And what if she...rejects me?”

“Nothing can stop you from being friends. You might be in a weird stare for a while but I’m sure it’ll smooth over time. I...I mean, I haven’t confessed to my crush, but I feel like I should go for it too” she shakes her head, “Ah, I didn’t mean for it to be about me.”

“Well, have you thought about following your own advice? It’s not like you and Pekoyama-san have something going on” they smirk at her. Before Sonia could say anything, Rantaro kept going. “Yeah, both of us have a type, a particular type. You’re a wonderful lady, and Pekoyama likes you.”

“How do you know?”

“When I travel, I take photos of animals for her. We talk, then she talks about you at times…”

“It’s because I’m a princess and wants to rule in my kingdom as a knight, that’s all”

They shrug. “I think being a queen in a better position. But she never calls you a princess, it’s never brought up. Just how intelligent and friendly you are, beautiful, generous...I could go on. She sees you for you, inside and out, and she’s so at ease when talking about you” Their green eyes shine with positivity, “And I believe that you should tell her...when the time is right”

“And you’ll do the same, promise?”

“...Yeah” Rantaro’s smile grows, “Promise”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kirumi speaks with Peko

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yikes

It’s been a long night of cleaning, Kirumi could feel her exhaustion sinking down to her feet and weighing the maid down. For once, she’s pleased about going to bed, then she can do her work in the morning.

“...Huh,” she stops and stares at a closed door. It’s not her dorm, but the one belonging to Rantaro Amami.  _ Them _ , the Adventurer that’s been on her mind for quite some time, she doubts that it would go away soon.  _ They’re not inside, I cannot hear their tv. Amami-kun has to sleep with it on. _

“Toujou-san” The call made her jump up slightly. It’s almost one in the morning, no one is up and about at this time. Strange, the one calling for her isn’t anyone in her class. Kirumi watches the grey hair free from braids flow freely behind Peko and she runs over to her. 

“Pekoyama?” She’s in her nightclothes with cute grey kittens, a gift given to the swordswoman, her. “You should be resting. Why are you here in the Harmony Dorms?”

“Nothing is working. I’m trying to find ways to stop thinking about Nevermind but it’s all a failure. I can’t even sleep, if I do then I will dream about her”

“Ah, I see” Kirumi has the same problem, “Have you tried training?”

“I’m not you, I cannot spend the whole night training. I have a sleep schedule” Not sure if it’s an insult or joke, Kirumi remains silent. “Then I would never be able to sleep. I...I want this to stop, Toujou-San…” Peko’s hands made their way to the taller student’s shoulders, “Help me”

_ How can I help you if I am facing the same situation?  _ Kirumi’s eyes dart everywhere but at Peko, this eye contact has been making her uncomfortable, there are so many emotions running through Peko, it’s overwhelming for Kirumi.  _ I bottle my feelings for Amami, but I wouldn’t give Pekoyama that advice. _

“You really like her, if I’m not mistaken” she begins, “And when you have feelings this strong, go ahead and act upon it”

Peko’s glare burns through Kirumi. “Act upon it? Why aren’t you following your advice?! You feel the same way about  _ them  _ and never took action!” 

“I-I-“  _ Don’t bring this to me!  _ “Pekoyama, I-I’m trying to help—“

“Toujou, I’ve made a mistake by coming to you” she points at Rantaro’s door, “I know that you take on more tasks so you spend less time with them”

“Correct. That method works for me, but not for everyone. I’m sure Nevermind feels the same way and you two would make a wonderful couple”

“I’m a tool” she states, “I am here to serve and protect my young master and everyone else. I am not fit to be anyone’s romantic partner...no matter how much I want it…” Peko takes a sharp breath, “How much  _ we  _ want it”

Well, that’s a sudden jab in her chest. Kirumi isn’t sure what to say, what to  _ do.  _ What kind of a maid is she if she cannot succeed at a simple task?  _ She’s right, that’s all I’m good for. Serving. _

She wants to hold Rantaro, just once. Share a loving look and have the opportunity to kiss them, be with them... _ I cannot do that, those are selfish thoughts. I’m being selfish now by not helping Pekoyama! _

“I’m sorry” Kirumi sighs, “I only say what’s best, but if that’s not what you desire...I cannot stop you. If you want to do what I do...so be it, but it won’t be a good idea” She knows, sadly.

“I didn’t mean to snap at you...it’s just, it’s late. I’m tired...I need to…”

Kirumi nods. Peko loses her words and leaves the Harmony Dormitory with no hesitation. She’s leaving on a bad note, with a question left unanswered and close to a heated argument. Her gloved hand glides over to Rantaro’s door, gently traces her fingers on the Plaque with their name engraved. 

Decorated like a small forest, little leaves dangling on the bottom, and white daisies petals on the edges. Rantaro Amami, Super High School Level Adventurer, known for their endless travels and knowledge around the world. They care for everyone like a sibling, quite intelligent (yet they do stupid things like climb the school or eat two tubs of ice cream), and overall a great person. Everyone can agree that they’re good-looking and an ideal partner,  _ but they’re not fit for me. _

Kirumi cannot stay out here and stare at their door, anyone could come by and see her fawning over the Adventurer, that’ll be a mess. She’s safe in her room and can tell everything to her rabbit doll.

“Naoki…” She picks up the droopy black and white rabbit, “I don’t know what to do. I want to help Pekoyama-san, I believe that they can be together! I know they can! It’s…” Her hands tighten around the doll, “I want to help them, but maybe I’m wrong. Maids are supposed to be there for their masters, assist them with anything given...and I…”

Kirumi falls back on her bed. “And here I am, just...It’s too complicated. Don’t give me that look, Naoki”

It’s time to go to sleep, rambling on about this to her rabbit will not get her anywhere.


End file.
